Online Dating: A Modern Step in Parent-Child Bonding

It was a beautiful weekend, crisp and clear after all that rain. I enjoyed a traditional Saturday breakfast with my family with one unusual addition: online dating story swapping with my father.

He's new at this. In the passing of my mother in January following a year of battling cancer, he has since taken up online dating, subscribing to sites such as eHarmony and Christian Mingle.

What's odd about this scenario is that not only is my father dating online (and when did he figure out how to use a computer without me?), but so are my sister and I. And we all live together. The topic is now a frequent one in the Graham household and I can't say it's not a little eerie.

“What's upsetting to me is that I could think our e-mails are going well and then when we meet, it's like I have no idea who this person is,” is my dad's complaint. “I'm wondering how I can be so off base.”

“I wanted to meet him for coffee but he was stuck on dinner,” says my sister during a discussion of dating woes, while my dad encourages her to allow men to treat her.

As for me... Well, I've talked about relationships with my father more than I ever have in my life.

It's certainly not where I thought I'd be. I'm in my mid-twenties, finished with college and back at home, only my family has undergone a drastic and somewhat traumatic change and we're all up to our elbows in dinner dates.

I'm glad Dad's getting out of the house. There are worse things than watching a parent date someone other than their former “better half.” With more and more of my peers dealing with a parent lost from deadly diseases or divorce, I wouldn't be surprised to find I'm not so alone in this weird, multi-generational, family dating bubble.

We already knew online dating is taking over. Nearly every Match.com television commercial cites the statistic that at present, 1 in 5 relationships starts online. Even more interestingly, the president and CEO of Spark Networks (owner of ChristianMingle, BlackSingles, SilverSingles and Spark.com) cited “significant growth” in the first eight months of 2011, bragging an increase of 93 percent of Spark users 50 and older. Ninety-three percent in a year!

The 55 and older crowd are apparently visiting dating sites in the U.S. more than any other age group, according to Experian Hitwise, an internet tracking firm. The reason for the exponential increase could be the steadily upward divorce rate. In fact, 37 percent of people 50 and older are unmarried, meaning a good chunk of single people out there who've already been-there-done-that with the bar scene. It could also be that older people working steady jobs want to be able to “meet” people on their own available time.

Many seniors actually have a great success rate in online love. In the case of my father --who courted my mother all the way in New Jersey, driving up from Virginia on weekends to see her-- he's a true romantic. Like many seniors who've loved and lost, he knows what he's looking for and he's not afraid to go all the way to Pennsylvania to get it.

Regardless of the method, I'm happy my dad plans to love again and that I get to see a new side of him. It's changed our entire relationship and family dynamic, but I know that one day he'll find a great companion. Who knows? She could be a few clicks away.